Peace and Subud
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“An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.”
(Mahatma Gandhi)
I was always a skilled conflict avoider. Anything for
peace and quiet. Bending gracefully like a willow, to avoid snapping, our hero
would soothe ruffled egos and smooth over disputes. But later on I noticed how
conflicts, after being soothed, tend to flare up again.
I became actively interested in conflict resolution
and studied an approach called Nonviolent Communication (NVC). I began to see
that conflict is not in itself “bad”. It’s an authentic expression of unmet
needs. What is regrettable is when the needs remain unmet. Smoothing things
over can be counterproductive: a way of avoiding dealing with vital issues. It
can be infuriating if your burning concerns are met with “There, there, don’t
get worked up!” Conflicts need to be heard, and what is useful is to have calm,
impartial facilitation when difficult issues are being discussed.
I began to wonder if Subud members might play an
active role in mediation and perhaps even in peace talks. Is it possible that
the latihan’s potential to help restore harmony between individuals could make
some real difference on a societal level? One of the most beautiful things is
to see alienated people come together, in an atmosphere of mutual respect.
One occasion that comes to mind is when Bethan (my
wife) and I were invited to teach in Belgium. My dance choreography has won
followers among both Flemish and French speakers in Belgium, and dance teachers
with their students came from North and South to the venue, which we had
deliberately chosen because it was central. Historically the two cultures are
at loggerheads, and hold prejudices about one another. They still don’t mix
together easily and political power struggles continue.
As expected, the day began with the two language
groups staying in two distinct camps. Something as simple as shared enjoyment
of music and dance, presented in a light-hearted and inclusive atmosphere, was able to help soften barriers, so that by
lunchtime participants began sharing food and having conversations across the
divide. The atmosphere became palpably more relaxed, and faces that had
appeared stern and anxious were creasing with smiles. On the follow-up visit, a
year later, it seemed almost as if they were a single unfragmented group. In my
work with international groups, and likewise at Subud world congresses, I have
seen many small but significant instances of barriers dissolving.
“We must learn to be the peace we want to create.”
(Mahatma Gandhi)
The generally acknowledged effect of the latihan has
three features of relevance:
• releasing
traumas
•
quietening inflamed feelings
• restoring
connectedness with one another
I’m not claiming that existing approaches to peace
processes are any less valuable. I’m saying that Subud’s contribution could be
added to these.
Subud members’ potential to support conflict
resolution processes will, of course, need to be developed step by step, in a
well-founded and practical way.
Over a period of time, we might hope to gain a
reputation for helping resolve disputes of all kinds. This will require us to
gain skills in areas such as conflict resolution, mediation and counselling.
In addition the judicious use of testing could help to
unlock entrenched conflicts. When a seeming impasse is reached, Subud
facilitators would be able to test a question such as, “How could I best
support a useful outcome to this dilemma?”
The primary aim of a peace initiative is of course to
benefit others, but there may be these reciprocal benefits for Subud:
a) Engaging
in mediation and peace work gives us an additional avenue for sharing our resources and being
less inward-looking.
b) This
is the kind of “spirituality in practice” that many people are looking for, and could provide a new way for
people to discover Subud.
The seed corn already exists, as we have begun a Subud
peace network, informally linking members who have an interest in this area.
The establishment of a Subud peace foundation would be a step forward. The aim
would be to support, co-ordinate and help to find funding for relevant
training, conferences and projects. This could be loosely modelled on the way
that Susila Dharma links our charitable initiatives around the globe.
One of the things Subud does extremely well as a group
is to set up and run international congresses. I propose that those interested
in this theme initiate and spearhead a small peace and conflict resolution
symposium for both Subud and non-Subud participants. If successful this could
be a blueprint for bigger and more globally significant events.
But isn’t this all wildly optimistic? A critic might
say that Subud groups aren’t exactly paragons of peace and harmony. I agree.
Although I’m fortunate to have been a part of several very supportive groups,
I’m aware that others have continuing unresolved issues. But it is just those
conflict-resolving skills I would like us to develop that would also be of
potential benefit to Subud groups experiencing discord. We can’t wait around
for a time when all Subud members and groups are in harmony. This will never
come about because in every spiritual group there are, and always will be,
people who don’t seem to be the least bit transformed by their practice, while
others begin to reflect the integrating power of sincere meditation, prayer
or—according to my experience—latihan. This fact of life doesn’t invalidate the
potential for some practitioners of a transformational approach, such as Subud,
to pool resources with a positive purpose and to develop something of worth.
It was suggested to me that if a member of the public
came across the SubudVision web site they might find it hard to reconcile items
which mention our unresolved disputes with a “seemingly naïve” item about Subud
and peace. But if we’re letting people see the whole picture including our
dirty linen, why hide a member’s hopes and aspirations?
I am not talking pie-in-the-sky ideas here, like Subud
involved in big front-line negotiations. With imagination one can come up with
achievable contributions that Subud could make to peace promotion. Just to give
two examples of small but effective initiatives outside of Subud: (1) There is a project called “Windows For
Peace” which produces a newspaper in Arabic and Hebrew written by Palestinian
and Israeli children, and arranges meetings between them and their families.
(2) There is a different type of “peace conference”
which is involved in the groundwork of bridge-building, and tries to counteract
the prevailing culture of blame that is so often the cause of front-line
agreements breaking down later on.
I’d like to hear if the
prospect of a Subud peace initiative inspires any other Subud members.
Contact me: stefan@freedmans.fsbusiness.co.uk
“We look forward to the time when the power of love
will replace the love of power.” (William
Gladstone)